As I entered the cool hospital room I noticed it smells sanitized and impersonal. Not at all like what my friend smells like. Alex my best friend lay in the bed and looked so helpless. Tubes were projected out of his bodies everywhere you could think of and more. His face was obscured by an oxygen mask and was littered with tiny cuts from when the glass shattered. He seemed so calm in his sleep.
The doctors had contacted his family but they lived five hours away and would not make it in time. The car accident had nearly killed him but the life support he was on would only keep him alive for two hours maximum because his internal injuries were so severe. I of course was also on his emergency contact list so I was able to make it to see him and be with him. The doctors told me that there was nothing more they could do and it was time to say goodbye. I gazed down at his body I realized I would do anything to save him. The time had come to say the hardest thing you can to someone you love.
“Hey Alex, I’m really sorry your Mom and brothers couldn’t come so I guess you’re stuck with just me,” I chuckled out bitterly.
“You are my best friend and I promise I’ll find the asshole who wrecked your car, ‘The Tardis’ and I’ll sick Dr. Who on them,” I laughed again. Dr. Who was his favorite show but I didn’t really understand it.
“I remember when we first met in chorus in 6th grade and we thought we were so cool for making All County. I remember how much we would laugh at Family Guy and all those dumb movies we would watch in your basement. We were such freaks in middle school. I still don’t really understand how people put up with us, probably because we are so fun. Hey, I hope you meet God and I’ll be all like ‘I told you so’,” I said and am no longer to hold back and begin weeping.
“I’m sorry I can’t be stronger to do this, you were always the tough one. You’re leaving though, I don’t understand why I can’t be there with you. This isn’t fair you can’t go,” I said as I angrily sat down trying to control myself.
You don’t want to say goodbye like this, I thought. I take a deep breath and stand back up and walk closer to his bed.
“Alex I love you. Not in a boyfriend/girlfriend way. I love you as someone I can’t be without. Alex, you understand me more than anyone I know. I’ll just say something completely not related to anything we were talking about but you get my train of thought. You have the most beautiful soul I think I’ll ever know. I remember when me and Leo broke up and you did the one thing no one else could, you made me laugh. I just was so sad and I never felt like I’d smile again but you made it happen. Remember that one night when I was home alone and I heard a noise in the house and I was so scared I locked myself in my room and called you and you came over to help me investigate. That was so nice of you to drive over and really spoke to our level of friendship. You made me laugh, you made me cry but most importantly you were my friend and I’m really going to miss you. Wait for me wherever it is you are and we will see each other again, OK I promise,” I said still crying and I gently gave him a hug without disturbing the lines and machines attached to him.
I called his mom and held the phone to Alex’s ear to say she loves him and she’ll be there soon. Alex passed on quietly without waking an hour later. I stayed at his side until his mother came and I left her to grieve. I gave his hand a quick squeeze and said quietly, “Until we’re together again.”